soooo confused...

why is it that i've wanted something so bad for so long & now that i'm about to get what i want, now that i'm getting closer to it step by step i feel so confused, i feel scared...

is it because it's a major step, a major risk in my life that i'm afraid to take the leap & get disappointed with what the results will be? am i afraid to disappoint myself? to disappoint the expectations of people around me? do i feel scared that i might realize that i don't really want it as much as i think i do?

so many thoughts running in my mind...i feel scared, i feel confused...maybe i do think too much...

i feel sick deep in my stomach...feel like throwing up...

farewell

after a long battle against pancreatic cancer, pavarotti at age 71, succumbs to his illness yesterday morning (Italy, local time)...

farewell to the most beloved & celebrated tenor...:(

turning a quarter

thanks to all who remembered:D ***hugs & kisses***

(special thanks to mer & joanne for dropping by, i was really surprised & touched. special thanks to sands too--whom i often chat with but have only known for a few months & met once--for being one of the first to remember.)